The Worst Movies I Have Ever Seen Vol. IV

1. "Cannibal Holocaust"(1980) It took me a long time to watch this notoriously-violent Italian found-footage exploitation film. It's reputation preceded it. I'm here to tell you not to ever bother. Sexual assault, violence toward animals, and of course, cannibalism all takes place in this Amazon rainforest. A sick, revolting piece of trash.

This horror comedy

We might as well double up on Geena Davis and Jeff Goldblum.

My god. This "sequel"(there's no narrative connection) to the 1986 oddity earns every bit of it's reputation

Jason

A killer genetically-engineered canine was a career killer for Ally Sheedy. The upstart New Line Cinema was still an indie horror outfit, and not yet the classy home of "The Lord of the Rings" trilogy. This dog of a movie did nothing to build that bridge. Sadly, writer-director John Lafia("Child's Play 1 and 2") committed suicide in 2020.

If you had asked my 14 year old self to name the worst movie ever made, I might have pointed the finger at cult comic Chris Elliott's first AND last starring role. Elliott got his showbiz start working for late-night legend David Letterman, who lent writer/director Adam Resnick to a doomed production(and the short-lived sitcom "Get a Life"). This is 80 minutes of pure misery.

Pain is precisely what I felt during this Damon Wayans military school comedy that's somehow worse than "Blankman".

While we're at it, Steven Seagal and Keenan Ivory Wayans were a match made in hell in this wildly-inept actioner that felt ten years too late. Perhaps, the worst buddy cop film ever created.

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The Farrelly brothers lent their names(as producers) to this pitiful laugh-free comedy. This was a BAD break for the previously-hot Heather Graham and Chris Klein, whose careers never really recovered.

I think it's pronounced "Jason Ten", but this montrosity doesn't deserve to have it's name said correctly.

Newsflash- Jamie Kennedy is NO Jim Carrey! I don't think anyone needed to be told that. The 1994 original is a triumphant fusion of manic comedy and clever FX. "Son of the Mask" is, you guessed it, a soulless cash-grab and one of the most depressingly awful sequels of all time.

Clive Owen and Jennifer Aniston are both badly miscast in a sloppy thriller that keeps piling on the absurdities.

Mary Steenburgen is lovely, but I had a strong negative reaction to the rest of this dreadful dance drama that doesn't ring true on any level. I think the world would too, if anyone knew that it exists. Robert Carlyle, Marisa Tomei, John Goodman, and Donnie Wahlberg are wasted here as well.

Samuel L. Jackson says the intention was always to make a cheesy "bad" movie. Congratulations, Sam.

Halle Berry

Director James Wan( would do better.

At least the title is apt.

This senseless sequel to the 2006 turkey is the cinematic equivalent of brain damage and should be kept far away from impressionable minds. Jason Statham, if you happen to ever read this, you fucking suck, dude. As soon as I finished this foul-up, I destroyed the DVD.

25. "The Fanatic"(2019) I like John Travolta, even though he's become a regular on these lists. I wish I could clean up his filmography. This insanely ill-conceived stalker drama was directed by "Limp Bizkit" frontman Fred Durst(WTF?), and is infinitely worse than his "Gotti" misfire from the year before. A flailing JT just hasn't been the same since "Battlefield Earth", and was in badly in need of career advisers as he searched in vain for another comeback. An absolute embarrassment.