The Worst Movies I Have Ever Seen Vol. II

1. "Zardoz"(1974) Sean Connery's outfit(or lack thereof) tells you all you need to know about this excruciating sci-fi adventure that swiftly brought "Deliverance" director John Boorman back down to Earth. And to think, Connery wanted to quit Bond for this.

2. "Mother's Day"(1980) This exploitative horror trash was an early contender for worst film of the 1980s.

3. "Sleepaway Camp"(1983) Oh, but a new contender has emerged. This pretty picture doesn't do justice to this micro-budgeted franchise starter, one of the most unpleasant experiences you'll ever have sitting in front of a screen. Aggressively, offensively awful.

4. "Leonard Part 6"(1987) Bill Cosby's crimes aren't limited to all those rape victims he silenced for so long. This vile spy spoof should have seen his sick ass in a courtroom a lot sooner.

5. "Weekend at Bernie's"(1989) This inexplicably popular corpse comedy from "First Blood" director Ted Kotcheff, is as lifeless and stiff as Terry Kiser's infamous Bernie. Andrew McCarthy and Jonathan Silverman made for a dreadful duo.

6. "Nothing But Trouble"(1991) Has a title ever been more apt, that the one that describes the absolute nightmare that knocked '80s comedy kings Dan Aykroyd(who also wrote and directed), Chevy Chase, and John Candy off of their pedestals?

7. "Ernest Scared Stupid"(1991) Jim Varney's intolerable ignoramus fights a hairy troll on Halloween.

8. "North"(1994) This notorious star-studded flop may be the reason that "great director" discussions don't often include the previously-unassailable Rob Reiner("The Princess Bride", "When Harry Met Harry", "Misery", "A Few Good Men"). Famously, Siskel and Ebert separately came to the conclusion that this was the worst film of 1994.

9. "Police Academy: Mission to Moscow"(1994) God, what a piece of fucking shit franchise this was.

10. "Tank Girl"(1995) This utterly unwatchable adaptation of the British comic book was a career killer for poor Lori Petty.

11. "The Stupids"(1996) Tom Arnold stars as Stanley Stupid(need I say more?).

12. "Mad Dog Time"(1996) The worst mob movie imaginable somehow attracted the time and talents of Jeff Goldblum, Richard Dreyfuss, Ellen Barkin, and Diane Lane.

13. "The Pest"(1997) "John Leguizamo is like a Latin Jim Carrey".- said NO ONE EVER.

14. Inspector Gadget"(1999) NO, NO, Gadget. The '80s cartoon show was never as clunky as Mathew Broderick's 80-minute misfire.

15. "Left Behind: The Movie"(2000) The whole world should have left Kirk Cameron behind, when "Growing Pains" ended in 1992. Instead, his religious zealotry kept him in front of the camera, proving conclusively that there is no God.

16. "Freddie Got Fingered"(2001) Fuck you too, Tom Green.

17. "Equilibrium"(2002) A pre-Batman Christian Bale's career looked quite unpromising in this ill-advised "Matrix" clone.

18. "From Justin To Kelly"(2003) This god-awful attempt to cash in on the "American Idol" craze was nominated for nine Razzies and made $19.47 cents at the box office.

19. "Duece Bigelow: European Gigelow"(2005) Saying that Rob sank to new lows in this sequel is about as dire a warning as you can possibly get.

20. "I Know Who Killed Me"(2007) Lindsey Lohan put the final nail in her career coffin in this appalling thriller.

21. "The Love Guru"(2008) Mike Myers was the only one laughing at the endless string of recycled, juvenile gags involving sex, bodily functions, and genitalia in the movie that forced the public to re-evaluate the "Austin Powers" star's status as a great comedian.

22. "Old Dogs"(2009) Robin Williams and John Travolta squandered more goodwill in this ghastly family "comedy".

23. Vampires Suck"(2010) So does this movie.

24. "The Raid: Redemption"(2011) A generic title, worthless musical score, non-existent character development, and dreary video game violence all led me(and Roger Ebert) to one unavoidable conclusion- a lot of fan-boy "critics" were fooled by this cult actioner.

25. "Movie 43"(2013) Kate Winslet, Hugh Jackman, Dennis Quaid, Naomi Watts, Emma Stone, Chris Pratt, Anna Faris, Halle Berry, Jason Sudekis, Richard Gere, Uma Thurman, Chloe Grace Moretz, Elizabeth Banks, Kristen Bell, Justin Long, Gerald Butler, Johnny Knoxville, Terrence Howard, Josh Duhamel, Greg Kinnear, Liev Schreiber, Kieran Culkin, Kate Bosworth, Seann William Scott, Seth McFarlane, and last but not least, Peter Farrelly. I'm calling them ALL out for their involvement in this unholy and evil sketch comedy.