A Critical Reevaluation- Terminator Salvation

   Ten years ago today, we finally got to see the "future war" between man and machine, that was only glimpsed at for approximately three minutes in the greatest sequel of all time, "Terminator 2: Judgment Day"(just don't tell "Aliens" and "The Godfather Part II", I said that). With a brooding, gun-toting, buzzcut-sporting Christian Bale, hot off the mammoth success of "The Dark Knight", installed as the adult version of the venerable John Connor, the stage was set for a serious relaunch of the rollicking franchise, created twenty-five years earlier by James Cameron. It was not to be. It's easy to point the finger at "Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle" director McG, and I'll be doing plenty of that, but the movie gods just weren't on the side of this sequel/prequel in the summer of '09. If you'll remember, Michael Bay's "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen" was released a month later, to rule with $402 million domestically compared to the relatively paltry sum of $125 million for "Salvation". Neither movie is great, but the passage of time has revealed Terminator 4 to be the better product, and in this context, that's a belated victory. Once the hype subsided, Transformers 2 became a reviled film, the encapsulation of everything we hate about Bay's hollow, bloated, bombastic style of aggressively commercial filmmaking. That doesn't retroactively let "Salvation" completely off the hook, but I'm here to explain why it deserves more consideration than it got from fickle fan-boys during Obama's first year in office.

   McG wasn't the right guy to lead the Human Resistance, that much is universally agreed upon. A glorified music video director, his absence from the world of blockbuster cinema in the 2010s confirms that he just wasn't cut out to follow in the footsteps of Cameron, Ridley Scott, or even one-time rival Bay. In fairness, Joseph McGinty DID put together a nice cast, though. Sam Worthington was about to headline the decade's biggest blockbuster, and the "Avatar" connection should have meant more than it did. The late Anton Yelchin gave us a teenage Kyle Reese, whose eventual rise alongside Connor could have been interestingly explored in the sequels that got cancelled. Similarly, Bryce Dallas Howard never got a chance to flesh out John's wife Kate Brewster, a "T3" character with a ton of potential(Howard's role in the "Jurassic World" franchise hints at what might have been). Common and Moon Bloodgood LOOK bad-ass as hardened Resistance members(isn't that a "Terminator" requirement?), while Michael Ironside's ineffective early leadership had the makings of a savory subplot. Damn, I wish this movie could be remade with an R-rating and a Marvel director(not Alan Taylor).

   I guess the real purpose of this blog is to try and inject some positivity and optimism into a film series that I've loved since I first saw Arnold blow away every Sarah Connor in the phonebook. "Dark Fate" is a do-or-die, last-chance reboot, and it remains to be seen what impact the REAL Sarah Connor, Linda Hamilton will have this November. It's important to make peace with the past before we proceed into the unknown future, and accept "Salvation" as a satisfactory entry in a long-running saga(save your slander for "Genisys"). Today's twentysomethings might not fully understand that the first two films are landmarks in the sci-fi action genre. If nothing else, "TS" fill in the blanks of the mythology. There's no shame in not living up to a pair of James Cameron epics. The fourth "Terminator" is also better than the fourth "Alien" and the fourth "Indiana Jones". How about that? Love live Skynet, even though there's a robot rolling around at my other job right now. The War is on. Join the Resistance.

A Critical Reevaluation- Star Wars: Episode I- The Phantom Menace

  
   Twenty years ago today, the most anticipated movie ever made, caused mass absenteeism at every workplace in the country. I hope all you "Avengers: Endgame" enthusiasts believe me when I tell you that the buzz surrounding the first(chronological) "Star Wars" movie was intense and inescapable from the moment the trailer dropped on Thanksgiving Eve 1998. Tears of joy were brought to the eyes of a generation that had been waiting since 1983 to witness the realization of a prequel trilogy teased by George Lucas around the release of "Return of the Jedi", and then quickly forgotten by the bearded maestro for over a decade("No more Star Wars", grumbled Lucas when pressed on the subject in the late '80s). It was a cinematic dream come true, and the box office was predictably massive- "The Phantom Menace" made $431 million domestically, and was the second-biggest moneymaker of the '90s, behind "Titanic". Something funny happened in the months that followed, though. Fans began discussing the film on the internet, and Jake Lloyd and Jar Jar Binks became our sworn enemies as we entered the new millennium. The previously-deified Lucas found himself defending his shiny vision from irate devotees that would have taken a bullet for him two years earlier. "Episode II" had some explaining to do in 2002, but there was just as much negativity as there was excitement waiting for Hayden Christensen that summer. Anakin never had a chance.

"Just don't go online, son".

   The real problem lies with aging fanboys that wanted "Episode I" to make them feel the same way the original did in 1977. Impossible. That was a very different time. There were zero expectations. Was Lucas the same filmmaker? Absolutely not. That twenty-two year break from the director's chair makes George more of a producer-mogul than an auteur like his old mentor Frances Ford Coppola. Those cuddly Ewoks were an early indication that pleasing children was a priority over at Lucasfilm. The 1997 rereleases of the OT revealed a fondness for unnecessary and distracting CGI. There was no Harrison Ford on set to fearlessly proclaim that "Stars Wars" dialogue could be typed but not spoken. We ignored the red flags that should have told savvy observers that "The Phantom Menace" WASN'T going to be the greatest movie off all time. But only a fool would suggest it's one of the worst, with a rad pod race, a legendary lightsaber battle, and a young(er) Liam Neeson constituting some of the series' best moments.

Admit it, Maul gave you an erection.

   The size, scope, and ambition of Lucas' serialized storytelling has inspired nearly every franchise in the 21st Century. In a way, he changed the business all over again. Nothing ever really ends, there's always another chapter, another layer, another billion dollars to be made in the sagas of Marvel, Harry Potter, Ethan Hunt, the Hobbits, Transformers, Terminators, and Jack Sparrow. We have an insatiable appetite for familiar characters and worlds, and the prequels' financial windfall proved it. Would Disney have paid $3 billion for a reviled property? The Mouse House knew that "SW" fans are like masochistic sports fans, that tune in next season NO MATTER WHAT. What's the point of all that complaining, if you're still going to pluck down $15 to see every additional episode in IMAX anyway? You're just pissing in the wind. This fanbase is morphing into something I'm not sure I want to be a part of. I'll still see the movies, I just won't bother discussing them with other 'fans'. They suck the fun out of it. "The Phantom Menace" never deserved your relentless derision. There's REAL people with REAL feelings behind this thing, and they're not all invincible multimillionaires(see Ahmed Best). Bite your tongue about the Trade Federation during the next "SW" holiday marathon. Besides, you've got "The Last Jedi" to beat up on now.